Joy Joy Joy

There used to be a song that was often sung around the campfire at church camps and other places with a line that went "I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy - Down in my heart - Down in my heart to stay."  I don't know how I got that in my head.  I must have joy in my heart!

What brings you joy?  I've asked that question here before but think about it for a moment once again.  There are tons of answers to the question.  There really isn't a wrong answer.  What brings you joy might not bring me joy.  Does some of your own joy come in the giving too?  So how can a feeling of great pleasure and happiness be felt by those around you?  What can you do to share the joy?  Do you every purposely try to fill others with joy and happiness?

For me joy is pretty awesome but like with this blog, it's NOT about me and it's not just about my joy alone.  I really am most joyful when I am surrounded by other joyful people.  Seems pretty obvious what we need to do then.  We need to spread the joy, especially during these difficult times!

Did you ever know that you're my hero

Remember when Bette Midler sang "Did you ever know that you're my hero"?  The song is Wind Beneath My Wings and numerous other artists recorded it, but the point I want to make is regarding its lyrics.  I think it is talking about a friend or relative, someone who is special and whom she considers her hero and her idol. There is nothing wrong with a little hero worship and I think everyone should have someone like she does!

 

A few months before my mother died, I was helping her set up a new telephone lifeline system and, as a backup password, they wanted to know the name of her hero.  Without hesitation Mom said "Dad," meaning her father.  How wonderful that long after he had died, my mother still looked at her father as her hero.

 

I write here often of people we might consider heroes.  Some are well known, and some are folks that would only be known within their community.  What is it that make them a hero though and has anyone ever encouraged them to continue that behavior?  One of the things I like about that Bette Midler song is that it seems to be addressed directly to her hero.  How wonderful!  Let that person know what you think of them.  Oh they my blush and even say "aw shucks!" but acknowledging good behavior only encourages more of it, and that certainly can't be a bad thing!

National Honor Our LGBT Elders Day

Today is National Honor Our LGBT Elders Day, a time to recognize and celebrate the contributions and struggles of older LGBTQ+ individuals who paved the way for equality and social acceptance.

Remembering our past is always a good thing, especially when we honor those who paved the way.  Get involved, if you aren't already.

There are a whole bunch of ways to honor LGBTQ+ elders. Use social media to show support, possibly changing your cover of profile picture to honor LGBTQ elders. Spend some time with these longtime activists and listen to their stories to preserve their history and wisdom. Consider volunteering with organizations that provide support, advocacy, or companionship for older LGBTQ+ adults.  Maybe make a contribution to the Rainbow Honor Walk.

As we honor our LGBTQ+ elders, let us continue the work they have begun and build on it for future generations.

Pie

Each year on the third Friday in May, millions of pizza lovers across the nation join in extolling the qualities of pizza on National Pizza Party Day. After all, is a party really a party without a good old pizza pie?

Today also happens to be Chocolate Chip Day. Seriously. I don't make this up! Now you might think of chocolate chips as only being in cookies, but you would be missing out. I once had a chocolate chip pie that was incredible.

National Apple Pie Day was Wednesday. (We sure celebrate food a lot). If anyone has a slice of apple pie left, it's okay to continue the celebration today. If you prefer, make a nice berry pie.

Perhaps at this point you think I have gone crazy.  Why all this pie talk?  The thing is, we need more happiness in our world.  For some folks that means pie.  Whether or not you are a dessert eater, go out today and find something that makes you happy, and if it happens to be pie, what a tasty way to be happy!

last request

Do you ever read the obituaries in the newspaper? Sometimes they can be humorous and sometimes they simply gave details of someone's life. Lately though I have come across several that are very inspiring, not just because of the life that had been led, but because of a last request.  There was a wonderful obituary a newspaper last week that brought me to tears.  A brother wrote some very touching words about his sister who had lived with cerebral palsy.  "I wish I could have made you laugh one more time," he wrote.

Frequently in obituaries there will be an "in lieu of flowers" statement, that directs folks to a charity that is significant to the deceased.  I also have seen some very nice "last requests."  In telling of one man who had recently passed away, the obituary said that one of his last wishes was for any person reading the obituary to perform a good deed in his honor for someone that they may have had friction with or disliked. Wow! Someone wanted to continue the love even after they were gone. How wonderful. How many people did a good deed in his honor? There is of course no way to know, but what a wonderful idea!

Maybe this will inspire folks reading this to make other last requests. What would you want your legacy to be? How would you like to be an inspiration to strangers, even after you are gone?  Of course, estate planning is another way to help those who come after you while also keeping your name alive.

Givers and Takers

There are two kinds of people in this world:  givers and takers.  It is very likely that the takers eat better, but I am absolutely certain that the givers sleep better!  (Someone, Marlo Thomas I think, said that before).

 

I am so blessed to know many, many givers!  I definitely am acquainted with more givers than takers.  How wonderful, huh?

 

In the Acts of the Apostles, Saint Paul tells us to "remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.”

 

I would add that being givers is certainly wonderful, but there are times when we have to let others give to us.  It is certainly not a bad thing to graciously accept a gift.

Flowerful days

Who can look at a colorful bunch of flowers and not be happy?  There is something very cheery about the image whether it is in a cut floral arrangement or a garden in back of our house or a pretty planting by the side of the street we are walking on.  Flowers are happy images.

 

I'll bet you cannot tell me every place where there is a flower between your home and your workplace.  Can you think where the closest garden is to where you are right now?  How about a florist - do you know where there is one?  Even our parks are places where there are beautiful flowers and plants for us to enjoy.

 

If you are at a reception or at a church service or at a funeral or a wedding, do you notice the flowers that might be around you?  People place them there for a reason.  Flowers brighten up our lives!  Take notice of them and be happy.

hello? anybody out there?

Who reads this stuff?  I wonder that a lot.  It was never my purpose to have tons of daily readers and to receive so many comments and so much email that I could not keep up with it, but the fact is, I get only about two or three comments a month.  This makes me wonder is there anybody out there?

Part of my wondering of course is to see if this is all going in a good direction.  I want to make a difference in the lives of others.  I want to encourage other people to make a difference in their various ways.  I want to light a fire or put some fuel on an already lit fire and see how great we can make this world of ours.  If we all contribute, there is nothing that cannot be accomplished!  There is so much good in the world and I am always encouraged when I see that good.  I am also personally encouraged when I hear that people read these words and that it has some kind of meaning for them.  Please feel free to make suggestions too.

Next month is LGBTQ+ Pride Month and now more than ever we need positive reinforcement, so I will most likely be writing on that subject a lot. Since you just made it through these three paragraphs, why not take a second and say something in the comments area below.  Is there some way of giving back that you think I should be talking about?  Tell me!  Do you know a giver that perhaps I should profile here?  Tell me!  Do you think I need to change my focus or say more (or less) about something?  Tell me!  I really would love to hear from you.

Spreading out the love

Today is Mother's Day in the US and some other parts of the world. I'm thinking of my mom, as I do just about every day, and I hope you will be thinking about yours, whether she is living or deceased.

Some folks don't have good relationships with their mothers, but if that is the case, take a moment to think of her anyway. Is there anything you can do to improve the relationship? It seems that Mothers Day would be an excellent day to begin.

I'm sure there will be huge crowds at restaurants on Sunday, especially at the ones doing something for the moms. Cards, and gifts, and sometimes even breakfast in bed - all kinds of attention. How wonderful, huh? 

 What has always bothered me though is when all the attention is focused on one day. The same is true for birthdays, anniversaries, and many other occasions. There will be lots of celebrating on that one day, and the rest of the time a person might be virtually ignored. Wouldn't it be nice if Mom got a little more attention at other times of the year.  I'm reminded of a song from the old Captain Kangaroo tv show, "It's Another Be Good To Mommy Day."

I have a friend who lives far from her mother and they only see each other a few times a year, but every single Saturday there is a telephone conversation. They both set aside time on that one day to connect with each other.

Spreading out the love throughout the year is a good goal to have not only for our mothers, but for other relatives and friends as well. Make regular lunch dates, or phone time, or share activities at random times all through your life!

Too Big

The whole task - the "making change in the world" idea - some may just shrug their shoulders and say "It's too big"! How often have we heard that? There is so much to do. How can one person make a difference? With that "it's too big" attitude, we are counting ourselves out even before we begin. It's the little things though that really can make a difference. Certainly, we can all do some little thing! 

It was Mother Teresa (now recognized as a saint) who said "If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one." She certainly got that one right!

Don't worry if you don't have tons of time or tons of money. Give what you are able to give. That's the key.  If we each give back something - anything, it really will make a difference! Give a few minutes of your time. Put a sign up in your window.  Donate cash or clothing.

In the familiar Bible story of the loaves and fishes feeding the five thousand, we always assume that Jesus created more food. What if it was a different kind of miracle? What if Jesus made us do the work that he knew were capable of doing? If some of the people had brought food with them, even if just a tiny snack, then they could have combined that and everyone could have been fed. Now I know some of you might not like me suggesting that a popular Scripture happened a little differently than we have always thought, but consider it for a moment. The crowd was too big to be fed by the small amount of food they knew they had. Jesus was not worried at all though. Very much the same as now. We ask God for more food or more money or a better job. Perhaps when we achieve these things it is because he led us to our own accomplishment.

If we all do a little - if we all do what we can, it will make a difference. Nothing is too big when everyone pitches in!

Live for something greater

Just what does it mean to live for something greater?  Think about it for a moment.  Are we talking about great accomplishments?  Are we talking about a greater power?  Are we talking about a set of values?  What do you think?

 

I write a lot about hometown heroes and to me, those are the folks who live for something greater.  It might not have been something they thought about or planned, but by their actions or by their words, they made a difference and it was something that endures.

 

Do you want you live to be infancy, school, work, retirement, and then death with no great milestones along the way?  Well most of us don't.  It's human nature to do new things and along the way to become more and more popular and to have more and more friends.  Although we know we cannot live forever, many of us want something we do or say to last beyond our time on this earth.  That's what motivates them to do great things.

 

The motivations can be many.  There need not be just one answer to my above questions.  How about if we all strive to live for something greater!

Buddy can you spare a dime?

There probably aren't many of you who can remember all the way back to the 1932 song Buddy can you spare a dime, even though it was recorded by a number of different people. Perhaps you have been asked if you could spare a dime by someone on the street. Most who ask for a specific amount, are very willing to accept ANY amount. Being in need, is not a good thing, whether you are an individual, an entire family, or an organization trying to help others. They need donations, and they need them from us.

Does our donation have to be that dime? Oh no! We might not be much better off than they are. The list though of things we might donate really is endless. Sometimes when we think of giving, we divide into categories such as time, talent, and treasure. The treasure grouping is the one that gets the most attention. Give some money - the more the better. Our treasure might also include donations of used clothing or housewares or canned goods (to a food drive) or a car (many charities now look for used cars or even boats). Artwork might also be part of this list, and books too.

Donating our talent is a very valuable thing too. This is true whether your talent is taking blood pressures or giving tax advice or reading to children. Sometimes doing yard work or light cleaning can be a huge help to individuals in need.

Donating your time is another wonderful thing. Can you spend a few hours helping out in the office of our non-profit? Can you come in one day and help hand out bags of groceries? That yard work I mentioned - is it talent or time (or maybe both)?

Offer help in whatever way you can, even if it's just making friendly phone calls to check on the wellbeing of your neighbors.  As I have mentioned here a lot, giving takes many forms. Buddy, can you spare some time? Buddy, can you spare a dime? Giving in all its forms, is such a rewarding thing to do! 

The Wish

When you were little, did you ever make a wish and then blow on the dandelion to see if your wish would come true?  Perhaps you looked up at the night sky and made a wish on the first star you saw or before blowing out the candles on your birthday cake, hoped for something.  We have all made wishes at some time or another.  Some of us spend our whole lives wishing.

Do you wish that wars would disappear?  We ALL do!  Do you wish there was an easy solution?  Do you wish for different leaders?  Do you wish things were being handled differently?  Make a wish, and then make it happen.  We all can do our part.
 

Tossing a coin into a fountain or breaking the wishbone of a cooked turkey may be fun to do, but I happen to think that wishes are good things and that they all can come true, wish a little help.  That's the important part - the little help.  Sometimes we help ourselves fulfill our dreams and our hopes - you might actually think of them as goals.  Sometimes we can help others with their wishes like when you donate to charities.  The Make-A-Wish Foundation helps make some wishes come true, but I'm really talking about dreams we ALL have.  We wish and then sit back doing nothing more sometimes.  What we need to do is wish and then make that wish a reality.

 

Difficult?  Well yes.  Sometimes it is difficult.  Life isn't always easy, but anything really worth having is worth working for!  So, don't give up on that wish.  Make it come true!

The Month of May

I will resist any cute references to Cinco de Mayo and this morning. Yesterday I didn't even say "May the fourth be with you." There are a lot of observances this month and I hope you will enjoy at least some of them.

135 years ago today, Carnegie Hall in New York City held its grand opening with the great Russian composer Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky as guest conductor. Also on this date, in 1942 Tammy Wynette was born. In 1956, Elvis Presley had the number one hit, 'Heartbreak Hotel.'

It's not just music on this date. 65 years ago today, Alan Shepard became the second person, and first American to depart the Earth, making it to low-Earth orbit in his capsule called Freedom 7. It was really a big deal back then.

There have been so many great moments on the fifth of May throughout the years.  We can add to it of course.  We can go out and do something great!

desired things

The 1927 poem, Desiderata (Latin for desired things) by American writer Max Ehrmann, has long been a favorite of mine. I've mentioned it here before. Since I desire happiness for everyone and I desire that everyone realize his or her importance, it seemed fitting and proper to mention this wonderful prose once again on this Monday morning. It being in the public domain, I'd actually just like to print it here for you all to ponder and enjoy:

 

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

 

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

 

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

 

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

 

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

 

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

 

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

 

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

 

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be.

 

And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

 

                                                                                                                -Max Ehrmann

I wish you enough

This story was recently shared with me by a friend. I found it very powerful and asked if I might share it further with all of you.

Recently overheard was a father and daughter in their last moments together at the airport. They had announced the departure.

Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the father said, 'I love you, and I wish you enough.'

The daughter replied, 'Dad, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Dad.'

They kissed and the daughter left. The Father walked over to the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see he wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on his privacy, but he welcomed me in by asking, 'Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?'

'Yes, I have,' I replied. 'Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?'

'I am old, and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral,' he said.

'When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, 'I wish you enough.' May I ask what that means?'

He began to smile. 'That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.'

He paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail, and he smiled even more. 'When we said, 'I wish you enough,' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.' Then turning toward me, he shared the following as if he were reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.
I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

He then began to cry and walked away.

Again, not my words, but a message I thought we all could benefit from.  They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them; but then an entire life to forget them.

Do you need a compass?

What do I do? Where shall I go? What comes next? Does my life have any sort of purpose of direction? Well, if you are asking yourself these questions, it's a good thing. Every once in a while, it is important for each of us to take stock of ourselves and look not only at where we have been, but where we are going. Sometimes change is a good idea. Do you need some help? Do you need a compass? There is nothing wrong with reaching out to others to try to decide your path.

 

Family and friends can be a great resource in helping to determine with way to go.  When a loss within your family has gotten you asking these questions, it might be even more important to lean on each other, so to speak.  They are not the only resource though.  Some of us have tons of friends and great big families.  Others are a bit more alone.  There are professionals who also can be of great benefits.  Counselors, clergy, health care workers, attorneys, teachers, and others might help guide you when you find yourself questioning what comes next.  Getting involved in support groups can sometimes be of benefit too.

 

The library used to be a great place for finding information.  It still is, of course, but now we also have the internet where we can find answers to our questions in seconds.  Sometimes these answers are all we need as our compass.

 

Nobody should ever have to go through life feeling lost or confused.  Life is more than just being alive, and we all have a purpose.  Find yours.  Life will be so much richer once you know the path you are taking!

colored water

I can remember as a youngster being in the supermarket with my mom and seeing the drinking fountains (remember them?) labeled "white" and "colored." I had no idea this was racial - I thought the water was white or colored! Naturally I wanted to drink the colored one. A woman witnessed this and scolded my mother for letting me drink where "those people" had put their mouths. My mother explained it all later, but it was several years later before I really understood.

Or do I understand? Why should someone drink from a certain fountain and not from another, just because of their race? Well, the answer of course is that they shouldn't. Separate drinking fountains are illegal now, but sadly, we still have racial prejudice - I see examples most every day even now in 2026.

The whole drinking water thing apparently hit home with many.  Diane Bass, the mother of entertainer Lance Bass, wrote an essay several years ago which I just read the other day and in it she recalls her drinking fountain moment.  With her grandmother screaming at her to stop drinking from the "wrong" fountain, Bass writes "When I looked at the fountain it had the word "Colored" on it and she told me I had to drink out of another one. I was only 6 years old but I knew something was just not right about that."

Many of my friends are Asian and one time I was out with several other guys, all of whom are Asian. A group of white guys came upon us and started yelling at me "Why aren't you with your own kind?" They even chased after us, and since we were outnumbered, their senseless prejudice was not in the forefront of our minds - we simply wanted to get out of there safely.

I see the same kind of bias against lgbtq people often. I've been very fortunate and haven't been the victim of individual attacks, but all the laws that ban same sex marriage or that allow prejudice against lgbtq people in the workplace or anywhere else, are certainly attacks. They are saying I am not quite as good as someone else.

In all my years and will all that I have seen, the prejudicial treatment of people based on their membership - or perceived membership - in a certain group or category, just doesn't make sense to me, and yet it continues.

Is a world with true equality too much for me to hope for? Can we put aside all prejudice and discrimination? Will bigotry ever be completely erased? What do YOU think?

It's Gonna Be May

Thinking about Joey Fatone, Lance Bass. JC Chasez, Chris Kirkpatrick, Justin Timberlake this morning because of tomorrow.  Yup!  It's gonna be May!  (I have no idea who started that, but it's fun every year).

I want to say something else about these five guys who used to be the band nsync.  They bring a lot of happiness to the world.  Making a difference doesn't have to be about making the front page of the newspaper.  Making a difference isn't just those who make great scientific breakthroughs or who work hard for social justice.  Sometimes making a difference is about bring joy and happiness.  If you ever listened to an nsync song, you know there is a LOT of joy and happiness!

Since the band broke up, they have continued bringing that joy and happiness in their individual careers.  They also have done a lot of giving back and making a difference in their charity work.  Lance has been an especially outspoken presence for the LGBTQ community.

So beginning tomorrow it's gonna be May, this I promise you, and to April let's say bye, bye, bye!  

Adapt a shelter animal

Looking for an animal to add to your household?  Consider adopting a shelter animal.  I have written here a number of times about pet adoption, but you really cannot say enough.  It is one of those win-win situations - there are many advantages.  

A word or two about shelters (which some refer to as the "pound," short for impoundment).  Animal shelters provide a safe and caring environment until the animal is either reclaimed by its owner or adopted by a new owner.  While we often hear about shelters euthanizing animals (and this does indeed happen in many public shelters when animals are not adopted with a certain time period), most private shelters are run as no-kill shelters.

Animals deserve love and affection though.  Just because they are not going to be euthanized, does not mean they should continue in a shelter.  Yes, they generally are well feed and provided for, but animals deserve more than that.  They deserve love and attention.  In return, they usually GIVE love and attention to their caregivers.

Ask your co-workers.  Talk to your friends.  Do a little reading.  I'm certain that everything you hear about adopting a shelter animal will say the same thing.  It will warm your heart, and it will warm theirs too!

Can we all be superheroes

Do you have what it takes to be a Superhero? I think we all do. Too few of us act on that though. There are all kinds of things we can do though to make a difference in this world, and it doesn't require any special powers at all. This morning I was thinking about some fictional superheroes and somehow got thinking about the real ones too. Each year on April 28th, National Superhero Day honors superheroes, both real and fictional.

While the adventures of Alexander Lexington, Peter Parker, Julia Cornwall Carpenter, and Scott Lang may be a lot of fun, there are everyday folks who are superheroes, and I would love to see more said about them. Oh, and for me, the folks who do good after something good has been done for them, and special pay-it-forward heroes. A small act can be huge to another person.

Does a superhero have to be a famous person? Of course not! We are more likely to hear about them, but there are everyday heroes that nobody ever hears about, and they are so very important too. We all can be those heroes. We all can stand up and make a difference.

Who are the heroes in your life? A teacher perhaps, or maybe your parents? What about a famous singer or athlete? One of my heroes is rapper and activist Jason Chu who several years ago shared some powerful lyrics "But I’ve learned: a hero isn’t about being super. We become heroes because of what makes us human."

Before you kick it

I've always felt that having goals is a good thing. Lately I hear more and more people talk about their bucket lists. Are they really such a good idea though? Some people say we are rushing death (the term "bucket list" coming from kicking the bucket, a popular expression meaning to die) and others say we are creating lists with difficult to fill ideas. I'm thinking though that having defined goals, can't be a bad thing.

Some folks list very simple things, and some come right out of a thrill-seekers guide. What about you though - are there places you would really like to visit or people you want to meet of see perform or maybe some special things you want to do?  How about this:  don't just make a list but include other folks.  There are organizations that help fulfill the wishes of dying people, but how about if we all did something really special before someone else passed away - a shared bucket list if you will.  I think I could really get behind that idea!

So how many of you think that is a good idea? How many of you have a bucket list of any kind? Before you kick the bucket, is there something special you want to do for others?

more

More.  Some of us are never satisfied.  Some of us always want more.  How can we do more though?  What can we do to make more of a difference in this world?  Where are the folks that already are doing more? Day after day I write here, but do I have all the answers?  Of course not!  Together we have a lot of answers though, certainly more of them.  On this Sunday morning, it is important to have more answers and for us all to pitch in and do more.

 

So, what do YOU think?  There are more ways of doing things than I have written about here.  Can you share some ideas?  The more who contribute here, there more answers we will have in the end.  This is really a follow-up from yesterday.  Come!  Join in the discussion!

 

I want to change the world for the better and I am doing ________ to achieve this.  What would you put in the blank?  I hope we hear from many of you.  Share some more of your good ideas!

The answer is YES

Can I change the world? Someone actually questioned me about that. After reading this blog for a while, they sent me an email asking, "do you really think you can change the world?"

The answer of course is YES! I can and you can and all of us can if we get involved and if we do something and if we simply TRY to make a difference. Will sitting alone in a room and moaning about the things we don't like change anything? Probably not.

This blog does not give you all of the answers. I certainly don't have all of the answers. Nobody has all the answers. I never have pretended that to be the case. I don't think I am the authority on change or involvement or making a difference - I am just one voice. I do hope you will join me though.  It's amazing what can be accomplished when people come together.

I would love to hear your comments too. Occasionally I get an email, but you can comment right here too so that other readers can easily read your thoughts (and you can even do so anonymously). Changing the world for the better is something all of us should be interested in doing! Join us!

Watch what you say

When somebody mentions their doctor, do you automatically picture a man? How about secretaries, do we picture a woman automatically? If a man says he wants you to meet his spouse, do you immediately think he is referring to a woman? We need to change the way we think and they way we say things! If we really believe in equality, we should think about things like this.

I remember a television commercial for a deodorant, many years ago that talked about an airline pilot. Viewers were thinking of a man flying the aircraft, but in the last frame we see that it is actually a woman. Even those of us who fight every day for equality, can't get those images out of our head that we have been conditioned to see. When reading someone's biography, when we see that they are married, most of us still assume the opposite sex. Until recently many computers would try to correct us if we said "her wife."

Sometimes pronouns that refer to gender are misused out of ignorance.  Our transgender sisters and brothers should expect that they will be referred to with the gender they have transitioned to.  It is ignorant to call a man "she" and just plain mean to say "it."  Human beings are never it.  Oh and transgendered isn't ever proper even though many well-meaning people have used it.  I could go on and on about the many reasons that one is wrong. 

I was thinking that we need to watch what we say.  Perhaps we also need to watch what we think.  Is it conditioning or prejudice? Can we open our minds to see a bigger picture?

One person can make a difference

Seventeen years ago, when I wrote my very first entry here, I spoke of changing the world; of giving back to society; of making a difference.  The theme of this blog has remained the same throughout and I trace it all back to my childhood when John F Kennedy was the US President.  Kennedy challenged us to dream.  He challenged us to make a difference.

It has been more than fifty years since his words were spoken, but they carry the same encouragement now, as then. On January 20, 1961 at his inauguration at the US Capital, Kennedy said the line most often quoted: "Ask not what your country can do for you—ask what you can do for your country." The President was challenging every single American to contribute in some way to the public good - to make a difference. We still can answer that call!

I don't remember if it was Jacqueline Kennedy or John Kennedy who said this (it has been attributed to both, although Caroline Kennedy credits her father with the words in her forward to the anniversary edition of Profiles In Courage). "One person can make a difference and everyone should try." Indeed. Everyone.

 

I know this blog is NOT about me, and I don't know of my success here, but every day, through my blogs and activism, I want to do something that benefits someone else.  I hope you will join me.

Over the Years

Eighteen years ago, I thought about starting a blog, but I didn't want it to be like so many others.  It was not my intention to share recipes or travel news.  I decided it should be about other people, not me.  

At first, I thought about doing simple one or two sentence messages of inspiration.  Perhaps I could write about kindness.  (That kindness blog finally came into being nine years later and I still write that one too).  This blog ended up being about people and organizations making a difference.

Over the years I have written about a lot of people here.  Some folks have been mentioned more than once.  There are a few things I regret having written about.  It is my intention to continue writing this and maybe some of you have enjoyed this daily stories.  I must admit that on a number of occasions I have "borrowed" from other people, but I always have clearly indicated that.

There is still a lot of good in our world, even with all the craziness that exists in 2026.  Thanks for reading.  Keep coming back.  Perhaps someday I will write about you.

Love until it hurts

Mother Teresa once said, "I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love." Wonderful!  How can more love ever be a bad thing?

I remember that every time I talked to my mother, she said something about love.  She loved me and my sister but she also loved life and her friends and her everyday experiences, and it showed in everything she did!

I can remember a church in San Francisco where the members used to wear buttons (and hand them out to visitors too).  The buttons say "More Love." What a wonderful concept! I hope that church still has those buttons.

We write here in this blog each day about making a difference in this world of ours. Love is what that comes down to. You cannot do good deeds without love. Love brings joy to those who give it and to those who receive it. Love truly does help us make a difference. Mother Teresa made a difference in this world because of love.

Love is worth it!

how do you say thank you?

How many ways are there to say thank you?  I'm not talking about the many different languages, although putting together a nice graphic with those two words as they are said in other tongues can be a lot of fun and I'm sure would be pleasing to the person you are thanking.  What else though?  What can you do to convey that you are actually grateful for that something you have received?

 

We give thanks at different times for different things.  Sometimes a polite courtesy is almost taken for granted, but when somebody hold the door open for you or pulls out your chair or refills your water glass, say thank you.  When you receive a present or money, then most certainly thanks should be offered.  How about when you ask for someone to help you with a project?  Let me just say there is never a bad time to offer thanks. 

 

You are an awesome caring person and I'm sure you want folks to know you appreciate those things they do on your behalf.  Let it be known then! Let them see your happy dance!  Notes are always nice too.  I know many have fallen away from the habit of writing personal notes, but the most awesome people I know still write them and it means a lot.  I was just talking about this to a group of people, and every one of them agreed.

I know we can get back in the habit.  Say thanks in the way that works best for the particular occasion but say it!  I have so many reasons personally for saying it today.  That breakfast burrito I ate a little while ago and someone special made it happen.  Thanks!

Just because

"Why are you doing this?" I heard him ask. "Just because," was her simple reply. "Just because."

You can say you are giving back because you want to change the world or because you want to make a difference. You can say you want to see a smile on the face of others or that you enjoy doing things for people. You can say that random acts of kindness help make things better for all of us and you are simply passing them on. Of course, you don't have to give any reason at all! Just pay it forward .   .   . just because.

Oh, those wonderful kind deeds we do for other people. They sure do brighten up the day!

How many of those just because things can you think of? How about taking an acquaintance to dinner, sponsoring someone in a fundraising walk-a-thon, donating time at a senior center, saying something nice to everyone you meet during your day, or donating blood? What other random acts of kindness can you think of? Add your suggestions in the comments section below.

Be a blessing

We can all make a difference in the lives of those around us.  Let's get with it!  Don't hesitate!  Today will never come again.  We really shouldn't put things off.  Be a blessing.  Encourage others.  Be a friend.  Smile.  Share the love.  Take the time to care.  Make someone feel special.

Imagine how much good you can do just by caring!  Imagine.  It's doesn't need to take a lot of time.  It just takes an open heart.

During this summer, in the midst of a lot of bad news, we can still be a blessing to each other.  Things are never too bad for us to do good.  I won't sugar-coat it and say everything will be back to normal soon (although things have obviously improved from a year ago). great right away, but if we all pitch in and do good, we will see a difference. We might not ever see things the way they once were, but that does not mean things won't be good.  Let's make it so.

If every single one of us did something encouraging every day, the positive changes would be incredible!  Being a friend is one of the most powerful things we can ever do.  Starting off a brand-new month, let's all resolve to make this world a happier and healthier place in which to live.

Everyone smiles in the same language

I am convinced that there is just not enough happiness in the world. Why? No matter how bad anything is, there is always reason to go on. Things can always get better.

I know. Someone is going to say, "What if the doctor says you have only a few days to live"? Well, doctors can be wrong. I have heard many stories confirming that very fact. I even know a woman who was told just after her 60th birthday, that it would be her last. In fact, she was told she had only a few months to live. That woman is now 93!

We so often have trouble trusting these days. We have difficulty communicating too. Does he speak the same language as I do? Will we understand the meaning of our intentions? All of these things are valid of course, but one thing we seem to overlook. Happiness is easy to spot and easy to understand. Happiness is very easy to spread too. Happy people are more likely to make others happy.

Whatever part of the world you come from - whatever your race, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender identity, age, or eye color, one thing is universal. We all smile in the same language!

do the right thing

Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was a great man, usually referred to with the honorific Mahatma, meaning venerable, and most often thought of as a leader of non-violence.  He is often quoted and had some wonderful things to say about doing the right thing.

It is easy to do the "expected thing."  Many folks do the "thing that will bring them the most recognition."  The "right thing though is often the toughest - frequently it is not the popular thing to do.

“It's the action, not the fruit of the action, that's important," according to Gandhi. "You have to do the right thing. It may not be in your power, may not be in your time, that there'll be any fruit. But that doesn't mean you stop doing the right thing."

 

Gandhi was so very wise.  He went on to say "You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no result.”

Blood

One of the kindest things a person can do is donate blood. Donating blood can save lives and has benefits for both the recipient and the donor.

To donate blood, you need to be in good health, at least 16 years old (17 in some states), weigh at least 110 pounds, have not donated blood in the last 56 days, and be able to pass the physical and health-history assessments.  Most of the population is eligible to donate yet sadly too few actually do.

Not sure if you can?  Check with your nearest blood bank.  In large cities, you can donate any day of the week.  In smaller communities, blood drives are held at hospitals, schools, churches, and other locations.  Despite all of our scientific advances, we cannot create blood in a laboratory.  When someone needs a transfusion, it comes from the blood already donated and on hand.  I had the privilege of coordinating blood drives in my city for a number of years, and it always warmed my heart hearing stories of what motivated people to come out and donate blood.

If you already are a blood donor, thanks so much.  Keep it up.  Think about reaching out to friends, family, and coworkers.  Blood is always needed.

A Life-Changing Story

I have to tell you the words below today are not mine, but this story, which has been circulating on the internet, really touched me. I have no idea of the author, but I am so glad this was written. Please read on -

Her eyes met mine as she walked down the corridor peering apprehensively into the kennels. I felt her need instantly and knew I had to help her.

 

I wagged my tail, not too exuberantly, so she wouldn't be afraid. As she stopped at my kennel I blocked her view from a little accident I had in the back of my cage. I didn't want her to know that I hadn't been walked today. Sometimes the overworked shelter keepers get too busy and I didn't want her to think poorly of them.

 

As she read my kennel card I hoped that she wouldn't feel sad about my past. I only have the future to look forward to and want to make a difference in someone's life.

 

She got down on her knees and made little kissy sounds at me. I shoved my shoulder and side of my head up against the bars to comfort her. Gentle fingertips caressed my neck; she was desperate for companionship. A tear fell down her cheek and I raised my paw to assure her that all would be well.

 

Soon my kennel door opened and her smile was so bright that I instantly jumped into her arms. I would promise to keep her safe. I would promise to always be by her side. I would promise to do everything I could to see that radiant smile and sparkle in her eyes.

 

I was so fortunate that she came down my corridor. So many more are out there who haven't walked the corridors. So many more to be saved. At least I could save one.

 

I rescued a human today.

Obituary: Common Sense

This is something that was floating around on the internet a while back. I have no idea who wrote these words, but they spoke to me, and I hope they have meaning for you. Even though this is an obituary, I happen to think it is not too late - we CAN save common sense - we just have to try!

"Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.

"No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

"He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;

- Why the early bird gets the worm;

- Life isn't always fair;

- and maybe it was my fault.

"Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

"His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

"Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

"Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

"It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

"Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

"Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

"Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

"Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

"He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers: I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is to Blame, I'm A Victim

"Not many attended his funeral because, so few realized he was gone.

"If you don't remember him, join the majority and do nothing."

Start each day with YES!

Sometimes with all the negativity in the world, it can be difficult for us to stay positive, but I have found it helps to have a very simple resolve: start each day with YES!  Our minds are powerful tools though and sometimes just thinking something gives us a very good boost.  Having a yes kind of attitude can go a long way!

 

Now I won't make believe that there are not any problems in the world.  Certainly, there are many.  Can we solve every single one of them?  Probably not today.  We can make a start though.  We can do some good.  Of course, changing the world means believing in yourself and your ability and trusting and believing in other people as well.  It's a tall order I know.

 

Think about the opposite though for a moment.  You wake up in the morning and ask if it's going to be a good day.  NO!  Am I going to eat a nice, delicious breakfast?  NO!  Will the commute to work be an easy one?  NO!  If you begin each day with negativity, there is no chance there for a smile - no chance for a happy day.  Even when something bad happens, no matter how minor or how big, shrug it off believing that better things are coming.

 

Yes, I'm going to have a good Sunday and a good week ahead!  Yes, you are too!

Daddy may I borrow $25

Those heartwarming stories that circulate on the internet can be quite inspiring.  From time to time I have shared some of them here, although I always wish I could give credit to the writer.  Here is another author unknown tale:

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year-old son waiting for him at the door.
SON: ‘Daddy, may I ask you a question?’
DAD: ‘Yeah sure, what it is?’ replied the man.
SON: ‘Daddy, how much do you make an hour?’
DAD: ‘That’s none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?’ the man said angrily.
SON: ‘I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?’
DAD: ‘If you must know, I make $50 an hour.’
SON: ‘Oh,’ the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: ‘Daddy, may I please borrow $25?’

The father was furious, ‘If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish.  I don’t work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.’  The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think:  Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25 and he really didn’t ask for money very often.  The man went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door.

‘Are you asleep, son?’ He asked.

‘No daddy, I’m awake,’ replied the boy.

‘I’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier,’ said the man. ‘It’s been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you.  Here’s the $25 you asked for.’

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. ‘Oh, thank you daddy!’ he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.  The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.  The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

‘Why do you want more money if you already have some?’ the father grumbled.

‘Because I didn’t have enough, but now I do,’ the little boy replied.  ‘Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time?  Please come home early tomorrow.  I would like to have dinner with you.’

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.

Let us learn from this story and one of the lessons should be the importance of our children, of all our family and our friends!